Yadi aapaka crush ek lambee kahaanee kah raha hai.aapake crush shuroo hone se pahale baat. aapakee crush aapako nahin lage ki aap svayan se bhare hue hain.
How to Talk to Your Crush Without Being Crushed
Ek crush karen, lekin har baar jab aap unhen kuchh
kahana chaahate hain to baahar nikalana? aap shaayad asveekaar karane se darate
hain ya aap kuchh bevakooph kahenge. khair, khush ho jao! aapakee sambhaavana
utanee kharaab nahin hai jitanee aapako lagata hai ki ve hain (vishesh roop se
yadi aap aur aapake crush pahale se hee dost hain). yaad rakhen, agar
aap kuchh nahin karate hain, to aapakee sambhaavana shoony hogee. is baat ko
dhyaan mein rakhate hue, apane crush ke saath vaartaalaap karane ke lie taiyaar ho
jao jo aapako crushed mein samaapt
nahin hoga!
Method - 1
Setting the Stage
1.
Isase pahale ki aap andar jaen aur unase baat karen, thodee
der mein rakhen. yah taiyaar hone ka bhugataan karata hai. aap adhyayan ke bina
ganit pareekshan nahin lete hain, ya kaksha ke bina draivar ke ed test paas
karate hain. jo log apane crush jeetane mein samay aur vichaar daalate hain,
unhen aam taur par jeetane mein behatar shot hota hai.
- Taiyaaree aur taiyaar hone ke beech ek achchhee santulan ko rokane kee koshish karen. aapakee crush un atirikt dhyaanon ko pasand karatee hai jinhen aap unhen dena chaahate hain, lekin ve aisa mahasoos nahin karana chaahate hain ki aap pichhale teen dinon se har ek doosare ke baare mein soch rahe hon. yah thoda daraavana hai, bhale hee yah sach ho!
2.
Kuchh samay pahale aaraam karo. gaharee saans len aur apana
poora shareer lamba hone den. jab aap saarvajanik nahin hote hain to yah
kabhee-kabhee aasaan hota hai. sone ya sone ya ghar mein aane se pahale apane
bistar mein aaraam karane ka prayaas karen.
3.
Bolane se pahale socho. aap apane ghabaraahat se adhik ho
sakate hain - ya ise pooree tarah se khatm kar sakate hain - apane vikalpon par
vichaar karane ke lie ek pal lekar. vaastav mein apane crush ke kareeb aane se
pahale ghar par abhyaas karen, aur aap chuppee ke ek ajeeb kshan mein pakade
nahin jaenge. apana samay len, khaasakar yadi aap kisee aise vyakti par pahalee
chhaap banaane vaale hain jo aapake lie mahatvapoorn hai.
- Darpan mein abhyaas karen. aap yah sunishchit karana chaahate hain ki aap jaanate hain ki aap kya kahane ja rahe hain, lekin ise achchhee tarah se abhyaas na karen. aisee kaee sthitiyon kee kalpana karen jinamen aapako apane crush se baat karane ka mauka mile, aur inhen darpan ke saamane kaary karen. jitana adhik taiyaar ho, utana hee aatmavishvaas aap vaartaalaap ke dauraan honge.
- Isake saath maje karo. nishchit roop se, aap jo kahana chaahate hain usake gambheer sanskaranon ko aazamaen, lekin ise pooree tarah se moorkh tareeke se bhee kahen jo aapako hansata hai. jitana kam gambheer aap svayan lete hain, utana hee svaabhaavik hoga jab aap samay aaenge.
4.
Unake baare mein kuchh pata karane ke lie jao. dhyaan den ki
unake notabuk mein unake paas kaun see tasveeren hain, ya ve dopahar ke bhojan
par kya khaate hain, ya ve kaun se khel khelana pasand karate hain. in chhote
lekin mahatvapoorn vivaranon ko jaanana aapako baad mein vaartaalaap karane
mein madad karega. yah aapako kuchh kahane mein madad kar sakata hai:
- "mainne aapakee notabuk par un philmen dekhee hain. main 80 ke dashak se philmon ke baare mein hoon. kya aapake paas pasandeeda hai?"
- are, mere dost aur main skool ke baad kuchh pikap khelane ja raha tha. ho sakata hai ki aap isamen shaamil hona chaahate hain yadi aap isake lie taiyaar hain? "
5.
Apane aatmavishvaas ko badhaava dene ke lie abhinav tareeke
khojen. Crushed ke kaaran shaayad aapako darane ka kaaran yah
hai ki isase aapake aatmavishvaas ko nukasaan pahunchaega. aisa hone do mat.
yah sirph ek vyakti dvaara apane aatmavishvaas ko door karane ke lie paagal
hai. Aapaka poora vishvaas is baat se aana chaahie ki aap
apane baare mein kaisa mahasoos karate hain. to isase pahale ki aap vaastav
mein apane crush ko jaanana shuroo karen, apane aatmavishvaas
ko badhaava dene ke tareeke khojen. is tarah, aap apane crush ke lie aur adhik
aakarshak honge aur kuchh bura hone par aapako crushed nahin diya jaega.
- Apanee phesabuk deevaar ko dekho. adhyayanon se pata chala hai ki keval 3 minat ke lie aapakee phesabuk deevaar ko dekhakar aapake aatmavishvaas ko kaaphee had tak badhaaya ja sakata hai. yah aajamaane ke kaabil hai!
- Apane pita ke saath thoda sa samay bitaen. adhyayan yah bhee dikhaate hain ki kishor jo kishoraavastha ke dauraan apane pita ke saath adhik samay bitaate hain, ve kam kharch karane vaalon kee tulana mein adhik aatmavishvaas se baahar nikalate hain. not: apane crush se baat karane se pahale kaee ghante pahale apane pita ke saath latakana sabase achchha hai. ye behatareen ke lie hai.
6.
Parinaam-svatantr banen. isaka kya matalab hai? isaka
matalab hai ki khud ko aisee sthiti mein rakhen jahaan aapako paravaah nahin
hai ki aapakee crush aapako vaapas pasand karatee hai ya nahin. yah
mahatvapoorn kyon hai? do kaaranon se yah mahatvapoorn hai. yah aapako
asveekrti se nipatane mein madad karata hai, jo aakhirakaar aisa kuchh hai jo
aapako karana hai. (yadi aap raaste mein kaheen bhee khaarij nahin ho rahe
hain, to aap koshish nahin kar rahe hain.) aur doosaree baat yah hai ki isase Aapako
apane crush ke saath svasth sambandh milane mein madad
milatee hai. ek suparaheero banane ke lie crush
banaane ke bajaay jo aapakee duniya
mein sab kuchh bachaega, aap unhen saamaany, lekin vishesh, vyakti ke bajaay
vyavahaar karate hain.
- kya? tum kaho. main aisa kyon karoonga? mere paas isaka niyantran bhee nahin hai. tum shaayad nahin. lekin kabhee-kabhee, ham apane crush ke baare mein bahut sochate hain, aur ham kalpana karate hain ki unake saath jeevan kya hoga, ki ham apane kaalpanik khud ke saath asvaasthyakar sambandh vikasit karana shuroo kar dete hain. ye kaalpanik rishte itane asvaasthyakar ho jaate hain ki ham khud ko is vyakti ke bina hone kee kalpana nahin kar sakate hain, bina kisee any vyakti ko bhee jaanate hain.
- Yadi aap parinaam-svatantr hain, to aapaka aatmavishvaas badhata hai. yah bahut se logon ke lie aakarshak hai. aapako nahin lagata ki kisee bhee ladakee ya kisee ek ladake se khaarij hona ek bada sauda hai, aur isalie aap ise door kar dete hain. aapaka vishvaas ek vyakti ko asveekaar karane se bada hai.
Method - 2
Apana kadam banaana
1.
Jab aap akele hon to apane crush par jaen. pahalee baar
jab aap vyaktigat star par talk karate
hain to aapako ek vichalit sthiti mein hona chaahie, bina kisee any logon ko
vichalit karane ke lie. udaaharan ke lie, lambee avadhi ke vaartaalaap ke lie
daans phlor ka beech bahut achchha sthaan nahin hoga.
Kaipheteriya mein dopahar ke bhojan ke dauraan apane crush par jaen. usase poochhen ki kya aap unake
bagal mein baith sakate hain aur talk shuroo
kar sakate hain. yah aksar eemaanadaaree se us ke roop mein saral hai.
- Ek paartee mein apane crush se baat karo. chaahe vah janmadin kee paartee ho ya pool paartee ho, yadi aap donon aamantrit hain, to aapase baat karane ka bahaana hai.
- Apane aapasee mitron mein se ek ke maadhyam se usake saath talk karen. agar aap apane doston mein se ek ke saath dost hain, to dost ke paas jao aur baat karana shuroo karen, usake lie aapako kuchh kahana hai.
2.
Apana parichay do. yadi aap pahale hee aupachaarik roop se
khud ko pesh kar chuke hain, to aapako bas itana karana hai ki ek saral
"haay" ya "hailo" kahen. jab aap namaste kahate hain to
seedhe aankhon mein apanee crush ko dekhana yaad rakhen. yadi aap namaste
kahakar apane joote par utarate hain to aap anajaane mein bahut kuchh kah rahe
hain.
3.
Khud ke baare mein apane crush se poochho.
vichaar-vimarsh karane vaalee cheejen poochhen jo aapakee vartamaan sthiti se
sambandhit hain- yadi aap thodee der ke lie baat karana chaahate hain to
"kyon" aur "kaise" prashn aam taur par sarvottam hote hain.
ye aksar gaharaee se charcha karate hain ki aap donon bhaag le sakate hain, jo
ek crush se baat karate samay aadarsh hai.
- Saral "haan" ya "nahin" prashnon se bachane ke lie yaad rakhen. yadi aap apane crush se poochhate hain "kya aap kanaada mein skool gae the?" unhen aapako ek lamba javaab dene kee zaroorat nahin hai. yadi aap apane crush se poochhate hain "kanaada mein skool jaane kee tarah kya tha?" ve bahut adhik baat karenge.
- Unhen apanee prshthabhoomi ke baare mein poochhen. ve kahaan se hain, unake maata-pita kya karate hain, ve kaise jaanate hain aadi. log, aapake crush mein shaamil hain, khud ke baare mein baat karana pasand karate hain.
4.
Yadi aapaka crush ek lambee kahaanee kah raha hai to
kabhee-kabhee injekshan karana yaad rakhen. matalab kuchh savaal poochhate hain
jabaki vah kahaanee kah raha hai. yah unhen dikhaega ki aap jo kahate hain us
par dhyaan de rahe hain. yadi aap kahane ke lie ek kahaanee ke saath aate hain,
to sunishchit karen ki aapake crush shuroo hone se pahale baat karana samaapt ho
gaya hai, aur ise chhota aur pyaara rakhen taaki aapakee crush aapako nahin lage ki
aap svayan se bhare hue hain.
5.
Apane shareer kee bhaasha par dhyaan den. aapakee bodee
laingvej bahut se sanchaar karatee hai, chaahe aap ise chaahate hon ya nahin.
kabhee-kabhee, aapaka shareer un cheejon ko kahata hai jo aap madad nahin kar
sakate hain. lekin bahut samay, yadi aap jaanate hain ki aapaka shareer kya kah
raha hai, to aap ise sahee kar sakate hain agar aapane kabhee ise dhokha diya
hai. yahaan dhyaan dena hai ki:
- Aankh se sampark. aankhon ke sampark ko banaana aur rakh-rakhaav karana kahata hai ki aap ruchi rakhate hain ki doosare vyakti kya kah rahe hain.
- Unakee disha mein chehara. apane shareer ko unakee disha mein chehara den. isaka matalab hai ki aap jo kah rahe hain usamen ruchi rakhate hain aur sharmeelee nahin hain.
- muskurao. muskuraate hue kahate hain ki doosara vyakti aapako khush karata hai.
- Shareer kee bhaasha ke saath ishkabaaj. khaasakar yadi aap ek ladakee hain. dheere-dheere apanee palaken ballebaajee karen, apane baalon ko ghumaen, ya unake kandhe ko chhooen.
- Apane chutakule par hansate hue. bhale hee chutakule majaakiya nahin hain, muskurao aur apane crush ko haasy karane ke lie apanee pooree koshish karen.
6.
Pik-up line ka upayog
na karen! aap jo kuchh bhee karate hain, pik-ap lainon ka upayog na karen. ve
bahut pyaare hain aur ve vaastav mein kaam nahin karate hain. yadi aap ek
ladake hain aur aap is baare mein nahin soch sakate ki pik-ap lain ke alaava
any kya upayog karana hai, to is lekh ko ek ladakee ke saath talk shuroo karane ke tareeke par padhen.
7.
Khud ko itanee gambheerata se na len. gambheerata se. yadi
aap ek saamaany vyakti kee tarah hain, to aapake crush ke kareeb hone se
aapako paagal ho jaega. aur jab aap is tarah mahasoos karate hain, to aapako
achchhee tarah se bevakooph saamaan karane kee sambhaavana hai. jhaadana. yadi
aap apane shabdon par yaatra karate hain, to kuchh kahen "vaah. main baat
nahin kar sakata. mujhe lagata hai ki ek sundar ladakee ke kareeb hone se aisa
hoga." yadi aap apane joote par yaatra karate hain aur vah aapako lene ke
lie aata hai, to poochh raha hai, "kya aap theek hain ?!" kuchh kaho "zaroor,
mainne vaastav mein socha ki mainne lainding ko kheencha hai."
8.
Ek taareekh ke lie poochhen. agar aapako lagata hai ki talk achchhee tarah se chal rahee hai, to poochhane
mein sankoch na karen ki aapaka crush phir se kab mukt hai. yah kal dopahar ke
bhojan ke samay kuchh bhee ho sakata hai, jo ki philm aur raat ke khaane ke
saath ek bahut hee puraanee taareekh hai - aapaka anurodh is baat par nirbhar
karega ki aap kitane aatmavishvaas se mahasoos karate hain aur aap kaise baat
karate samay crush karate hain.
- Ek baar jab aap ise soch lenge aur aap bata sakate hain ki ve aapakee roochi rakhate hain, to poochhane kee chinta na karen ki aap isake baad ek-doosare ko kab dekh sakate hain.
9.
Sthiti se avagat rahen. jab aap pahalee baar vaartaalaap
shuroo karane ka prayaas karate hain to aapako garmajoshee se svaagat karane
kee aavashyakata nahin hotee hai. yadi aapaka crush disenged ya oob lagata
hai, to poochhen ki kya kuchh galat hai; shaayad yah ek bura din raha hai,
shaayad unhen apane dimaag mein kuchh mil gaya hai.
- Yadi aapake crush ko vichalit karane mein koee prateet nahin hota hai aur usake saath usakee pareshaanee abhee bhee badhatee ja rahee hai, to khud ko vinamrataapoorvak kshama karen, jaldee se bachen, aur ek aur din koshish karane par vichaar karen.
10.
Shaantipoorvak asveekaar sambhaal len. yah sambhav hai ki
aapaka crush sirph aapake baare mein vahee mahasoos na
kare. yadi aap yah nirdhaarit karate hain ki yah maamala hai, to aap donon
abhee bhee baat kar sakate hain, lekin aapako yah sveekaar karana hoga ki
aapake beech ek romaantik rishta asambhav hai.
- Kisee aise vyakti ke lie anishchit pyaar mahasoos karane se bhee badatar kuchh bhee nahin hai jo pooree tarah se anajaan hai, isalie yadi aapaka crush dost-jon aapako bas sveekaar karata hai aur aage badhata hai.
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